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Ideal Helper Exercise
The purpose of this exercise is to identify personal qualities and behaviors that are useful for an effective helper, introducing the core conditions of acceptance, genuineness, trust and empathy.
Activity
In this exercise, reflect on a past problem and think about the person you turned to for help. What qualities and behaviors did that person possess? By identifying such attributes in others, you gain an understanding of useful behaviors that you can employ when interacting with others.
Think about a recent secret or problem that you shared with another person. Reflect on these three questions.
What was it about the person that made you choose them?
What specific aspects of their personality or behavior did you find helpful?
What did they say or do which helped you relax or encourage you to confide in them?
After spending some time reflecting on these questions, use the following to fill in your answers.
Question 1: What was it about the person that made you turn to them as a helper for this particular problem? (e.g., shared history, familiarity with the situation, etc.)
They were…
Question 2: What specific aspects of their personality or behavior did you find helpful? (e.g., gives good advice, sincere, reliable, etc.)
They were…
Question 3: What did they say or do which may have helped you relax and encourage you to confide in them?
They…